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Redneck dating etiquette

redneck dating etiquette-86

Anyways, I give him some Panadol and he went off real happy.

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This is fine with me as long as it is okay with my daughter.My daughter is putting on her makeup, a process that can take longer than painting the Golden Gate Bridge.Instead of just standing there, why don’t you do something useful, like change the oil in my car and rotate the tires?Spying them, the man calls out "Hey, brothers, come on down.I'm baptizing sinners, washing away their sin, just as the word says. He returned and said, "Yeah, I meant two-by-four." The clerk said, "All right. " The customer paused for a minute and said, "I'd better go check." After a while, the customer returned to the office and said, "A long time.

We're gonna build a house."The professor takes off his glasses, and says "Son, all the years I've been giving this lecture, no one has ever claimed to have made love to a ghost.

Rule Eight: The following places are not appropriate for a date with my daughter: Places where there are beds, sofas, or anything softer than a wooden stool.

Places where there are no parents, policemen, or nuns within eyesight. Places where there is dancing, holding hands, or happiness. I may appear to be a potbellied, balding, middle-aged, dimwitted has-been.

Otherwise, once you have gone out with my little girl, you will continue to date no one but her until she is finished with you. Rule Seven: As you stand in my front hallway, waiting for my daughter to appear, and more than an hour goes by, do not sigh and fidget.

If you want to be on time for the movie, you should not be dating.

Places where the ambient temperature is warm enough to induce my daughter to wear shorts, tank tops, midriff T-shirts, or anything other than overalls, a sweater, and a goose down parka – zipped up to her throat. But on issues relating to my daughter, I am the all-knowing, all-seeing, merciless god of your universe. It takes very little for me to mistake the sound of your car in the driveway for a helo coming in over a Wadi near Baghdad.