Red flags for online dating
These include Covert Gossiping, Arrogance, and much more: will find that normal, loving people do not raise any of these flags.After an encounter with a psychopath, most survivors face the struggle of hypervigilance: who can really be trusted?
You know them by name, and you know everything about their relationship—at least, your partner's version of events. They have extremely high expectations for fidelity, respect, and adoration. They adopt different personas for different people—transforming their entire personality to match various audiences.After first hooking you with praise and flattery, they suddenly become reclusive and uninterested.They make you feel desperate & needy, ensuring that you are always the one to initiate contact or physical intimacy. Plasters your Facebook page with compliments, flattery, songs, and poems. They tell you how much they have in common with you. Ex-lovers, friends, family members, and your eventual replacement.From the Psychopath Free book, now available in Barnes & Noble stores everywhere and online at: are a lot of phenomenal studies on the traits and characteristics of psychopaths.For professional research, check out Cleckley’s criteria or Hare’s psychopathy checklist. The red flags in this book are intended to supplement those resources. Well, for one, it’s specifically about relationships. Each point requires introspection and self-awareness. Because if you want to spot toxic people, you cannot focus entirely on their behavior—that’s only half the battle. You feel on-edge around this person, but you still want them to like you.It sounds like an alien trying to explain how they imagine human emotions might feel. They won’t care because he/she strategically distracts them with shallow praise (often done over social networking).
Psychopaths are able to maintain superficial friendships far longer than their relationships. Accuses you of emotions that they are intentionally provoking.
They will always blame others—it is never their fault. Total absence of anxiety, fear, and worry where there otherwise should be. You write this off as calm and cool, often feeling inferior and over-sensitive because you have normal human emotions. Insults you with a condescending, joking sort of attitude. Teasing becomes the primary mode of communication in your relationship.
They spend more time rationalizing their behavior than improving it. They subtly belittle your intelligence and achievements.
The ex becomes one of the most frequent topics of discussion in your relationship. You find yourself explaining the basic elements of human respect to a full-grown man/woman. After the idealization phase, they will give none of this back to you. It’s always very eerie when they slip and accidentally use the wrong mask for you. Any ex-partner or friend who did not come crawling back to them will likely be labeled jealous, bipolar, an alcoholic, or some other nasty smear. If you’re self-conscious about your looks, they'll call you the sexiest person in the world.
Normal people understand the fundamental concepts of honesty and kindness. If they're two hours late, don’t forget that you were once five minutes late to your first date. Gives you the silent treatment and becomes very annoyed that you seem to be interested in continuing the passionate relationship that they created. You will start to feel that their personality just doesn’t seem to add up. They will speak about you the same way to their next target. If you’ve got a need to entertain, they'll say you’re the funniest person they've ever known.
If you point this out, they call you hypersensitive and crazy. Uses social networking to provoke jealousy and rivalries while maintaining their cover of innocence. It’s never happened in any other relationship, but suddenly you’re scrolling back years on their Facebook page and albums. You’re seeking answers to a feeling you can’t quite explain. Surrounds themselves with former lovers and potential mates.